Daughter sparks debate after asking father to pay $200k for destination wedding

Marriage preparations typically bring happiness and excitement, yet the high costs of wedding ceremonies frequently transform celebration into anxiety.

One father experienced this situation firsthand. He shared his story on Reddit about the difficult position he found himself in after learning about his daughter's expensive wedding plans.

The New York resident posted his story on the Reddit forum AITA (Am I The A*e). He explained how he had originally offered to pay for his daughter's wedding ceremony. Many parents make similar promises to help their children start their married lives.

The father's generous offer faced a major challenge once he learned the full extent of his daughter's wedding plans.

His daughter did not want a simple local ceremony. She planned an expensive destination wedding in New Zealand's beautiful countryside. The guest list would include 100 to 200 people.

The wedding would cost $200,000. This enormous sum put the father in a difficult position. He wanted to make his daughter happy but worried about the excessive spending. He called it "burning money" and feared it would upset other family members.

The father explained his situation in his post: "My wife feels I should do it because we can afford it, but I find it to be a pointless showing of wealth. Now my daughter is not talking to me, nor is my wife. Which got me thinking should I bite the bullet and essentially burn money, and alienate family members to make my daughter's dream wedding a reality?"

Reddit users quickly shared their thoughts on the situation. One person responded: "If she can't pay for a destination wedding on her own, then she shouldn't be having a destination wedding. It seems cruel but it's true. Not to mention there's so much more money involved with the flights and the hotels and stuff. Is she going to be paying for her own ticket or are you expected to fork out for them too? And her fiancé's ticket."

The same user added: "Not to mention the fact that she's thrown a strop and isn't talking to you tells me she doesn't deserve it. I'm a believer of we are not entitled to our parents money. I don't expect any inheritance off of my dad if he ever passes, even though he has a big life insurance. I would rather have my dad than the money."

Another Reddit user suggested a middle ground solution. They recommended the father should offer only the amount he felt comfortable spending. This would let his daughter plan her wedding within that specific budget limit.

"Set the dollar amount you want to give and provide her with that budget. Tell her anything beyond that amount is her responsibility and her fiance's responsibility. Make sure you explain if that covers travel costs for the wedding couple and family members. If she wants an expensive wedding, she can fund it herself," the user advised.

The father has provided no further updates since his original post. His daughter continues to call him names and refuses to communicate with him. This behavior shows a lack of appreciation.

This situation highlights how difficult it can be to find the right balance between being generous and being practical. Parents face this challenge regularly.

How would you handle this problem if you were in his place? Share your thoughts in the comments section below!